I think people are not understanding what is going on. Borasss wants a 4 or 5 year deal at $25 mil a year for Manny and the Dodgers simply won’t do that. Ned said that he wouldn’t. Borasss is insisting on that length, so it does no good to put an offer on the table. Ned did it once. Borasss ingnored it. Ned is not going to budge, so until Borassss does, there is no need for an offer.

Don’t listen to Lawdog, he’s a lawyer!

A. A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

Q. How does an attorney sleep?

A. First he lies on one side, and then on the other.

A Lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth.

A lawyer is a gentleman who rescues your estate from your enemies and keeps it for himself.

A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer were asked “How much is 2+2?”
The housewife replies: “Four!”.
The accountant says: “I think it’s either 3 or 4. Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time.”
The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights and asks in a hushed voice, “How much do you want it to be?”

A Dublin lawyer died in poverty and many barristers of the city sub- scribed to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. “Only a shilling?” said the Justice, “Only a shilling to bury an attorney? Here’s a guinea; go and bury 20 more of them.”

“You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background,” sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand.
“If I wasn’t under oath, I’d return the compliment,” replied the witness.

A woman and her little girl were visitng the grave of the little girl’s grandmother. On their way through the cemetary back to the car, the little girl asked, “Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?”

“Of course not, dear.” replied the mother, “Why would you think that?”

“The tombstone back there said ‘Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.’”

For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap!

“Helen, why didn’t you write when you learned you were pregnant?” he cried. “I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the baby would have my name!”

“Well,” she said, “when my folks found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin’ and talkin’ and decided it would be better to have a bastard in the family than a lawyer.”

Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk, of course, the other three are mythological creatures.

A man walked into a bar with his alligator and asked the bartender, “Do you serve lawyers here?”.
“Sure do,” replied the bartender.
“Good,” said the man. “Give me a beer, and I’ll have a lawyer for my ‘gator.”